That's cold, man

One thought has dominated approximately 85 percent of my brain activity this week. At any given moment since school started, I was probably thinking, "It's cold" or "I'm totally freezing right now" or "Is the AIR CONDITIONING on in here?" or "I think my nose hairs just froze."

Since things probably won't warm up around here until at least April, I've created a scale to measure coldness (at least I'm channeling my creative energy somehow, right?). The generic "cold," I've decided, can be classified into one of three categories. "Cold," "cold," and "really cold."

Cold

This is the general term that begins circulating sometime in October, generally. It's commonly associated with the complaint that you can't wear a short-sleeved T-shirt with no coat while walking to the store. It's what people say when the Fourth of July fireworks start and they grab their sweaters. It's sissy stuff.

Cold

When it starts to snow, you really start to remember what cold means. It inspires scarves, heavy coats and gloves. It requires windshield scraping. It makes you re-route your walk to class so you can pass through heated buildings. It's not fun.

Really Cold

This is the worst thing, on this planet, ever. EVER. It's too cold to snow and there's no cloud cover to keep the temperatures up. It's the cold that penetrates to your muscle fibers and makes your ears sting. It's caused by deceptively clear, blue skies and dry air. It cracks the skin on your hands and chaps your lips. Cars won't start. Frostbite develops during a walk to class, even with the warmer re-routes. Don't even get me started on the wind chill.

It's what we're living in this week.

What kind of "cold" are YOU experiencing?