Sometimes it plays little tricks on you. Like when you think you're all grown up and you realize you're not. Or when you think you're not grown up and you realize you are.
That happened to me this morning. In case you didn't know, Ryan and I are bunking at my mom and dad's for a couple weeks because we had to be out of our apartment but, you know, have to go to class for another week.
Today we watched conference and I momentarily reverted back to my childhood — I ate potato chips and played MarioKart. Both were delicious. I thought I was getting another shot at being at little girl in my parents' house.
Then we helped my dad move things into my room. They've been painting and recarpeting and giving the whole house a little makeover (I'd post pictures, but my camera cord is waiting for us in Provo, along with 98 percent of our belongings). My room is now bright yellow with thicker carpet and looks so much nicer than the beige/beige combination I had growing up.
Suddenly, I wished I had painted my bedroom when I lived at home and still had walls I could paint. Mom kept asking me to, but I never did, mostly because it wasn't that important to me. Today, I looked at the back of a decoration I'd had on my wall for years and realized that I could have easily made more of them. I could have painted and made decorations and made my bed and made the whole thing really beautiful.
Oh, how I wish I had a wall I could paint now!
I guess it's one of those little tricks life plays on you. I started out this morning thinking I was a little kid. But I'm realizing that the desire to make a beautiful home and paint and decorate and CREATE has been in me all along. I just never nurtured it — until now.
Which (I think) means I'm
growing up.
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